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Well, I’d like to think of myself as a scientist, and what do we scientists do? We observe the world around us! So, for my own amusement, I have been making observations of what I consider to be the facts of life.

• The waitress won’t check on your table until your mouth is full of chewy steak.
• You won’t realize you have to go to the bathroom until you see a sign that says “Next Reststop 146 Miles.”
• Your washer works fine when the Maytag guy comes to look at it.
• Music will affect your mood as much as anything else in the world.
• Saran wrap will stick to everything but the plate of leftovers.
• Cheesecake tastes better when you’re on a diet.
• Change isn’t always easy (actually, it’s usually pretty rough), but you always gain something from it.
• The phone won’t ring until after you go to bed.
• Experts tell you that travel by air is safest, but the first thing the flight attendants do is prepare you for a crash.
• The first moment of laughing through tears feels like dropping a heavy load from your shoulders.
• You will only have black underwear clean the day you only have white pants clean.
• Running through a wide open field of wild flowers really is as magic as it seems in the movies.
• Ice cream will always cure what ails you.
• Wal-Mart is the root of all evil.
• Androgeny exists, but gender roles persist.
• If you are ever in a dark, creepy house and a madman killer in a hockey mask is chasing you, don’t run into the dark, creepy woods behind the house.
• That hot guy/girl will be ten times more attractive once you realize he/she is already taken.
• Life is contstantly undergoing revision. This could all be wrong tomorrow!

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